Overwhelming understanding.

I sometimes wish I could return to years past and inform my younger self of things I now understand. My former selves would scoff at me now though, make game of my nature. "I know," they would say. "I've always known." In understanding this, I realize they have never needed me, and that I have always needed them.

Several years ago, someone said to me, "do what you like, and you'll be well for it." They spoke of money then, this memory, yet it falls differently upon me now. It matters not simply in regards to earning a living in some distant, invisible future, but also here, presently. In the time and space which I exist, I must do what I like. And when I am not well, do what I like. And when I know not what to do or how to cope, do what I like. In some ways, I understood this meaning even then. I trivialized the speaker by damning the words as
obvious:

"You should always do what you like," I had snorted. "What else is there to do?"

I knew it all, once.

Stay with me though, I may know it again.